You’re having a laugh

As I’m on this ridiculous anxiety journey, facing fears I never thought I had, trembling my way through life with a racing heart and jelly legs, I often look for coping mechanisms in order to get me through it. 

My first example would have been classed as avoidance. In a situation I wasn’t comfortable in I’d be frantically on my phone texting anyone who’d have me or playing Simpsons tapped out (I’m over this game now). Now, I don’t so much avoid as look for ways to get me through this journey with some kind of a smile on my face. 

Now before I go into this, don’t get me wrong, I don’t think the actual journey or illness is any laughing matter. I’ve been rock bottom, so know what comes with it. What I do say though, is that I try to find something funny in whatever I do. 

For example, we’ll sit watching bear grylls and my girlfriend will say ‘would you ever absail’ to which I reply ‘I can’t even walk down the veg aisle of morrisons, never mind absail down a cliff’. This kind of attitude has softened anxiety for me. It’s no longer the serious thing that makes me who I am, it’s the laughing matter that comes with me wherever I go, just to keep me on my toes. 

I spend ages finding blogs to read which put a smile on my face, keep me laughing through what can be very dark times. 

I guess what I’m saying is keep smiling. It’s hard to do when you’re completely lost on a whirlwind of palpitations and jelly legs, but if you can stop for at least one second and look for humour, it can only make it a little bit easier. 

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