Exciting news: my best mate just proposed to his girlfriend (I helped pick the ring, she loves it, I’m brilliant) and has decided he wants me to be best man.
I never thought I’d ever be best man to anyone, I don’t particularly have a massive amount of mates, and many are much younger than me, so it didn’t seem likely. So when my mate asked me, I really was choked up. I love that I mean that much in someone’s life that they want to share their special day with me (and stag do…). My problem is, wherever excitement is, anxiety is sure to follow.
As much of an honour as the request is, I’m already thinking ‘oh no. What about the speech?’ I don’t do public speaking/presentations or put myself as the Center of attention. I never have liked it even prior to anxiety and now I’m of an anxious disposition it absolutely terrifies me! My first reaction is to say ‘nope, can’t do it’, get out of it and move on. Not this time though, I’m trying a new approach at the minute and I’m really hoping it works.
Instead of saying point blank ‘I can’t do that’, I’m starting to listen. When my boss says ‘we’ve got a big meeting on Thursday’ and usually I’d freak out, but recently I’ve decided stop, take a minute, and listen. Listen to what’s actually expected. Listen to what kind of event it will be, will I enjoy it, and am I capable.
I feel like I’ve earned the right to be best man. I’ve helped him crawl up a hill on a night out to get home, I’ve helped him through break ups with exes, we’ve been inseparable and we’ve barely seen each they yet we come back together and he’s like the brother I always wanted growing up.
So no anxiety, I’m not running from this one. No I can’t do a 10 minute speech with rubbish jokes. No I won’t be able to get the crowd howling and smash it because that’s just not me. But what j C can do is stand up for 30 seconds to a minute, and openly say how proud I am of my best mate for meeting someone, having her settle him down and creating their beautiful little boy (and my adopted nephew). So I’m not going to back down, in going to fulfil my duties as best man, give a speech from the heart and absolutely smash it. Oh, and the stag do will be in Ibiza and I cannot wait!