This is probably an odd post for a bloke to write, but I was thinking about it last night so thought I’d put it down in a blog post.
I had a discussion with my GF last night about people making her feel uncomfortable in every day life, to which she pointed out it happened just the other day when some guy she worked with made her feel really awkward as he made several innuendos and odd suggestive glances (needless to say she won’t be working with him again). She also said it isn’t a rare thing to happen and it really shocked me and to be honest I find it quite worrying. Then remembered me something that happened to me in the past, so here it is.
About 12 years ago, I attended college. I was quite a shy lad who carried a lot of weight (I was 19.5 stone at the time) so my confidence was really low (although this was pre-anxiety disorder). I would avoid catching the college bus because I wasn’t comfortable with the gimps jumping about everywhere, shouting, screaming and generally beings dicks, so used half my lunch money to catch the normal bus.
One particular day, about 2 in the afternoon, I was on the bus heading out of town on my way home, no one else on there but me and another lady. The bus stopped and on got two lads and one girl, all clearly off their face on whatever powder/pills/substance they’d shoved into themselves. Scruffy, loud, filthy and intimidating. I wasn’t far from home so didn’t worry about it too much as I’d be getting off soon. Then the woman got off, and it was me and the odd group. One of them was pacing up and down, trackies too big so they kept falling down and, well, put it this way, he’d forgot to put on underwear.
He’s swanning up and down, shouting, showing off and being an idiot. I’m willing the lights to change from red to green by my apparent telepathic ability that I thought I had. Then all of a sudden he sat behind me for no reason, with his fellow gimps laughing. I remember my heart beating but staying calm and looking out of the window. He then started saying stuff, suggestive, of what he’d like to do to me (of a sex kind). The fact I’m straight is completely irrelevant, the stuff he was saying was vile. I remember shaking a bit, as his head came to my ear, and I can still feel his breath as he whispered stuff. I just froze. Now I look back and think ‘why didn’t I move my head, why didn’t I just push him away, or do a James Bond style sideways headbutt’ but it just never happened.
My stop came, I quickly got off the bus as he was shouting stuff to me, and virtually legged it home, which for a fat lad with chub rub shows just how horrible it felt.
I guess looking back at that made me realise just how awful a lot of women have it (I know blokes suffer, but I believe it to be more common with women, please tell me if I’m wrong). I, a 6ft lad weighing in at something similar to a rhino was reduced to a frozen quiver by someone so off their face they couldn’t even remember underwear or a belt, so I can only imagine how it would feel to a woman in that situation on what often turns out to be a semi regular occurrence.
I never did anything about it, I couldn’t even tell you who they were, but I always remember feeling so uncomfortable, and would dread catching the same bus fearing they’d get on again. They never did. Based on the size of his pupils I’m not entirely sure he’ll still be with us.
I hope this post comes across in the right way. I think for anyone, particularly women, to have to go through that kind of treatment regularly is vulgar, and should be stopped. It makes me sick that someone running for president glamorised this kind of behaviour as ‘locker room banter’ and ‘every bloke does it’. No. No we don’t.
Stay safe folks.