Anxiety, my new ‘tag along’

Sometimes, all we want is some peace and quiet. Maybe I want to sit and play games on my phone for 3 hours because it’s easter Sunday and all of the chocolate has made me incapable of moving. Perhaps all we want is to go for a nice walk around the woods and enjoy a little bit of the outdoors without silly worries or someone poking you in the face to remind you they’re there.

Well at the minute, all of this seems impossible for me, as I currently have anxiety following me around 24/7 making itself known, reminding me that it’s there to try and ruin the day – and it’s frustrating. The kind of frustrating where you want to just punch it in the face, but it doesn’t have one.

I know I’m not on my own in this, luckily twitter allows me to connect with so many people going through the same things as me on the regular and it does help to know you’re not facing it on your own. I also have the tools I need to keep me moving forward, to keep me going, even when all I want to do is lay in bed and watch youtube videos of Ellen Degeneres interviewing a kid who knows all of the presidents.

I guess I’m writing this for two reasons, one because it helps me to get things out of my head and organise exactly what I’m thinking, but I also wanted to let people know that you’re so not alone if you’re feeling like this. We all have to deal with anxiety, it’s part of our system, our make up. It’s part of who we are. That doesn’t mean, however, that it’s WHO we are.

So anxiety may tag along, follow you around, prod and poke you to remind you that it’s there, but the biggest lesson for me is learning to let it. Like an annoying child, you can either give it attention, which feeds into the tantrum, or let it be and do it’s thing while you go about your day.

For now, I’ll keep going. I’ve got the tools I need to carry on, regardless of the negative thoughts plaguing me, and I’ll keep using them while ever I can.

If you’re struggling to understand how you can live well with anxiety, I often compare it to other illnesses. For example, liken anxiety to diabetes. It’s an illness that has to be managed, be that through diet or medication, and lives do change as a result, but by have making adjustments, it is possible to live a normal life with diabetes. For me anxiety is exactly the same. It’s an illness that affects my day to day life, and in order to live a comfortable and happy life, I have to make adjustments.

So that’s it really. Keep on keeping on. Let anxiety come with you, let it walk beside you and don’t give it the attention it craves. And if you want to lay in bed watching Ellen Degeneres youtube videos, that’s OK too.

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